Saturday, April 21, 2012

Old old old!

Once upon a time there was this imp of a girl, all of 5 feet with chubby cheeks and an unfailing enthusiasm to do all things eccentric and mad. The problem with these once upon a time anecdotes are that they are really old stories. The unfailing enthusiasm for all things unreasonable is still there. So are the chubby cheeks by the way! What I can't do anymore are night outs!

So, yesterday evening was spent in customary Friday fashion with some dear friends. There was something in the air yesterday. We had our you-can -see-all-my-teeth-because-I-am-very-drunk grin right after one beer (I kid you not!) and well, by the time the evening came to a sort of a closure, we were making plans at an alarming frequency. So, here's what happened. Sunshine was going to Bangalore that night and instead of dropping her to the bus stop, we thought it would be pretty neat to just go drop her to Bangalore! Easy, huh? We called up a friend and borrowed her car. The assigned driver for the night was sober, so don't judge us for being one of those rich brats with too much money and no common sense. Ofcourse, the part about us being rich is just to add some humor. I am soon going to author a version of 'Rich dad Poor dad' and I'll call it 'Rich dads of the World - Adopt me!' Anyway, so we picked up the car (which my friend had blessed with a super audio system a week back!) and off we went to Bangalore.

Its 330 kms from Chennai to Bangalore and we started at 12. The enthusiasm I was talking about earlier in the post had me singing in a very sing-like-no-one's listening fashion. All nighter road trip...wooohoo! As the clock ticked and the distance went down excruciatingly slowly, age caught up. Gave our chauffeur a back pain. Gave Sunshine a warm-ball-of-fur stance as she stretched out like a cat in the back. Gave me droopy eyes and the jerky motion that one gets when you try to stay awake but the mind thinks otherwise. I remember good old college days where nights were spent on bikes zipping through Marine Drive with the Mumbai police right behind us. Okay..I make it sound cooler than it actually was. That was one night, we were on bikes at Marine Drive and Mumbai police caught us thrice to tell us what they thought of young boys and girls who were up to no good at this time of the night! But what I was trying to say was back then, we didn't start dying a slow death by the time it was 5 in the morning. In those days at 5 am, we would have an opportune Maggi and katte pe chai moment. Sometimes tea at Lonavla. Sometimes we would just go watch the sunrise. But it was never 'Why God...why me! Why did you take my bed away from me!'. So you get it...no more all nighters for me. Am sure I'll forget this by tomorrow, but right now droopy eyes is all resolve!

You know what's super difficult. To apologise. To see someone in the eye and say 'I am sorry. I am an ass. But I can't exactly figure what to do with your absence in my good and bad times. I can't be better if you give up already. Your quirks which used to make life laugh worthy. The food you cooked, and I always took advantage of. Your faith in the little things I did. I can't figure what to do without all of that and so much more. So I really am sorry. I'd do 50 situps if that made you feel better. Or drop by at odd hours just to say hey!' Its tough you know to say all this. You have these conversations in your head about all that you'll say, and then you stutter. Because when you're that dear, it is that tough. The drunk plan to do an all nighter was just an excuse. For a smile and a hug. Next time I'll manage more than 'Hey! How've you been' in an idiotic nonchalant manner. What I do know is next time I'll just take the sleeper bus.