Thursday, February 11, 2010

Sunshine

This is an apology. A post for Sunshine. My reason for many a smiles. Why the apology? Because am such a goof up! And I really don't think there is an instant cure for that. So the post and the apology. :) I keep talking about my friends in my blogs. Why not! They make me the person that I am. Good or bad..you can go ahead and blame them! :) They are my best critics. So if I have a mean trait, blame my friends for not pointing it out to me. :)

I digressed. I'll get back to my original line of thought. So there are these two weeks in January, when living in Delhi is pretty close to hell. The days are hazy and bone chilling cold. The brain freezes and refuses to function. And then suddenly, there is this one day when the sun does come out. And when you stand outside and the sun rays warm you up..in a way that can only be felt..thats the kind of warmth Sunshine gets into my world. :) Just that with her, there's no winter. No season. She's like that. Everyday. The problem is that I can't cure her winters. I am cold at times. Selfish at times. Nice, only sometimes. And so the apology.

She is reticent. She judges. But she cares. Not the in-your-face kind of affection, but the 'I got your back..no matter what you do' kind of affection. That's my safety net. This kind of safety brings with it a kind of recklessness. Blaming my stupidities on her patience for my idiosyncrasies is a cheap stunt. I know. Told you am not so nice. Every time I tell myself I'll be more responsible, I end up on the wrong path. I err. She smiles and forgets. Someday I'll stop erring. For now, the apology.

I have come to realise that I mention Ma in almost all my posts. So I'll stick to the norm. The other day Ma and I were discussing marriage. It is amazing how often we talk about it..knowing very well that such discussions are quite pointless. She expressed concern about how I haven't liked a guy yet. I told her that the most amazing people I know are women. The gender being the catch. They set very high benchmarks and no guy has yet matched up to those high standards. :) Needless to say, Ma completely ignored my wisecrack. But, I did mean it!

So Sunshine. This post is for you. To tell you that kick my ass. Give me an earful. Am improving as I write. Day by day. It will take some time. Till then, stay on. The eccentricities and insanity won't go away. The irresponsibility will. Soon. For now, bring on the daily dosage of 'moron' and 'scoun'. They keep me on track! Love ya! :*

3 comments:

Tamanna Mishra said...

Loved it. What would we do without people who honestly tell us just how pathetic we are when we need to hear it :P

yamini said...

can feelings really b expressed so well !!!
hats off 2 u...

Akhil said...

Nice personification n well written..:-)